Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Sexual Harassment

Peanut: apparently i got a decent enough grasp on the last thing they threw at me, so today i get something new  
Peanut: and  
Peanut: my trainer is the guy i slept with a year and a half ago  
Peanut: so it's always awkward when we have to work together

Mrs. H: oh boy  
Mrs. H: well  
Mrs. H: good luck with that  

Peanut: and it takes all my self control not to blurt out "hey remember that time you saw my boobs??"  
Peanut: bc i think it would be hilarious
Peanut: but no  
Peanut: must work  
Peanut: and be professionalish 

Mrs. H: Focus on the Robo-bobcats  
Mrs. H: and work  

Peanut: but his reaction would be AMAZING
Peanut: he would collapse into a puddle of awkward embarrassed goooooo  

Mrs. H: haha  
Mrs. H: resist the temptation  

Peanut: and i'd poke him and sing "iiiiii saw you naaaaaaked, iiiiiiiii saw you naaaaaaaaaked"
Peanut: not a good idea?  

Mrs. H: Well, sure it would be hilarious  
Mrs. H: but the harassment suit would be over so fast  
Mrs. H: and you aren't rich - they'd take your cat  

Peanut: we are in the midst of company-wide sexual harassment training  
Peanut: so it's probably poor timing
Peanut: I knew I should've done it when I first got promoted to this team  
Peanut: or!  
Peanut: i could say i did it as a skit
Peanut: What Not To Do  
Peanut: it's part of the training!  
Peanut: 1. don't sleep with coworkers, 2. don't tease them about it later  

Mrs. H: while Goo Boy just lays there in a puddle of awkwardness  

Peanut: he's shy already so it's possible he'd explode outright  
Peanut: and then who would be left to sue me?  

Mrs. H: his family?
Mrs. H: and they would probably get extra  

Peanut: pfft  

Mrs. H: "Embarrassment induced explosion" is likely to get the sympathy of the jury


  1. That's pretty funny. You could scoop him up and leave him in a mason jar at his desk with two eyes floating at the top of it.

    Not really sure if eyes float, but it's funnier that way.

    1. We'll find out if they float if I ever lose my self-control and actually do this. Hee.

      PS I think you might be the only person who even still reads this thing. :P